Captain Ron’s VIEW FROM THE BRIDGE

September 2009

I received a notice from an insurance company. Home, auto, life, health, I’m not sure which. They all come on a regular basis demanding my immediate attention, along with a thousand other things going on at any given time. It was a very nice letter, well written and personal. It was signed, Sincerely, The Finance Office.

It was similar to others I have received over the years. I have gotten personal greetings from “Operations Department,” from “Alumni Office,” and even from “Credit Division.” I suspect that actual human beings wrote those letters, and that offices, departments and divisions are staffed by those same human beings. When I have tried to contact one I must first wade through a series of finger exercises designed primarily to wear out the #1 key on my phone. When I do reach a person I always ask for a name. Sometimes the respondent will hesitate to give me one.

At times I get a little impish. I think being raised on a diet of Robert Frost poems is to be blamed for that. I am known to say, “Is this Mr. Department?” or “I’m guessing your mom and dad gave you a name. Since I already gave you mine, can I have yours? Then we can converse like two people, rather than a customer calling a Division.” It’s a little game I play to remind the people that I am also a person. After waiting on hold my mind comes up with all sorts of cute and clever ways to help coax the humanity out of the Office Department Center on the other end of the line. After all, it will be the only time I’ll talk to this person. My chances of getting the same person twice are pretty small when dealing with large corporations.

Last week a family member of a Hospice patient calling us up and asked to speak to the person in charge. It happens occasionally, though they usually prefer to talk with the nurse. Nonetheless, we don’t think of their loved one as J4525 or whatever their patient identifier is (yes, all charts include patient numbers, in accordance with medical records regulations). I wouldn’t dream of saying, “Oh, hello, oldest male progeny of J4525. This is Administration. How may I help you?”

Occasionally if people call after hours they will wait on hold while our answering service connects them to the nurse on call. We are just the right size, able to be personal with everyone with whom we interact. We aren’t so small that we would need to turn someone away or refuse to make a house call in the middle of the night. We aren’t so big that we forget that you and your loved-ones are people.

We do have departments. The largest is the Clinical Department and it has a Clinical Director. Her name is Debra and she will take your phone calls pretty much whenever you call, provided you aren’t trying to sell her something. The same is true of me. As the Executive Director I oversee those who work in Administration and Finance. But if you have a billing question, I won’t put you on hold while I refer you to finance. I’ll have Teresa pick up the phone and help you. Our departments tend to have names like Carmen, Elysia and Kathy. And if you call back, you won’t get someone else the second time.

Sometimes we get pretty busy and can’t take your call at the moment. We try to get back with you as soon as possible. If you are selling something, be persistent. You aren’t going to be our priority. Taking care of our patients and their families will always take precedent. Nothing personal. When you’re the one in need, you’ll appreciate that fact.

Rev. Ron Jetter, Executive Director
Lower Valley Hospice and Palliative Care

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